There was an item about premature labour on Womans Hour last week
One of the consultants made the point that we are still worryingly ignorant about the fundamentals – there is no way of telling when labour is imminent, even in ‘normal’ cases
That brought back memories …
I left my normal weekly appointment at the hospital antenatal clinic distracted by the thought that my first baby was due 2 days before my next appointment
On the bus home I suddenly realised that I had forgotten the normal last step at the clinic – to fix the time of the next appointment. Just in case it were needed I had to go all the way back to rectify the omission
As things transpired I did need it. But I took the opportunity to ask if they were now in a position to give a more precise EDD
Oh no! You can never tell
Which seemed to me to give the lie to all that overheated political talk of a scientific revolution if we didn’t even understand the basics
Sleeplessness was the first sign that labour had begun. Although I am definitely an owl I usually had no problem drifting off after BBC radio closed down at 2 am after 2 hours of soothing MOR music in which Sinatra figured prominently
Restlessness took hold, soon turning into a real sense of urgency
The bathroom in our slightly dingy flat was not right for a new baby – the grouting was a disgrace
What was needed was a pail of hot water mixed with copious amounts of bleach & a good scrub with a retired toothbrush
It was only the thought of the neighbour’s reaction to the disturbance which stopped me from going ahead
Somehow I found other distractions until I felt the first thing that could be called a pain at nearly 7am
Another memory sent me to my commonplace book for 1990, to an article by David Jones, Daedalus of The Guardian:
“Many mothers will recall a strange, compulsive tidying-up urge that came over them shortly before they went into labour”
Daedalus speculates that this indicates the existence of a hormone IMMACULONE, one of the skein which governs the processes of pregnancy & triggers the urge to clean & tidy
He further speculates that, if identified, it could be used in both sexes to trigger a desire for order & tidiness – useful for teenage boys with messy bedrooms or scientists drowning in a sea of messy data
But, as is only too apparent, its greatest use would be as an easily monitored & reliable predictor of the onset of labour
